Mondays. Feh.

Garden porn that comes in the manner of glossy catalogs with impossibly beautiful and sharp pictures of the latest hybrids in unbearably intense colours only make me think of the things that I can't have, and probably will never have.

Of course, the thing to remember is that entropy will always be out there waiting for you. My point being that even if you have the lovely house and large, cultivated garden with all the garden porn stars lounging about, you'll have to work damn hard to keep everything in check. Because unlike real porn stars who, like the rest of us, become older and have to face the reality that life will render you helpless, in pain and will probably make you die all alone, garden porn stars will keep growing and growing - unless of course there's a sudden cold snap which lasts forever - much like what's happening here - that kills all the stars - then you grieve, and go out and spend more money replacing them, and the cycle repeats. Feh. not for me, thank you very much.

Much better to spend your on real porn. Even better to spend the money on seeds that you can plant, and nurture so that when you do get results, you can own them, and be proud of them.

It's Monday and I'm annoyed because nothing is working. The computer is lagging, the internet signal flickers - it's a sign I should switch to Fibre I think. Screw Vmedia. The dog is bored and wants to go out and run around, but I can't do that because the fields are iced over. My back hurts, my elbow is better but still not 100% - Are you paying attention AB? Will you put your clammy hands on the elbows and fix them again - and there is so much reading to digest not to mention I have to put together a one-page thing on some incredibly complex equipment and technologies. Feck.

Why did I spend all these years training to understand the complexity of science only to reduce it to simple sentences that "your grandmother (very presumptuous given that some people's grandmothers are Nobel Prize winners) can understand" as one agency puts it. Administrators. They mean well, but they know nothing about the realities of life. I hate them, and yet I aspire to be one so that I can be better.

Anyway - nothing is working, nothing is connected in this supposedly connected world.

My Tua Ee died last week and I'm saddened because she's no longer here, and also because that means my generation is the one next to death and that means I'm running out of time and I haven't even got to the part of life where I can think about getting a real garden together and putting garden porn in.

And of course there's more reading to be done and more justifications to come. Tired of running only to remain in the same spot. Right. A list.

  • Run more - the burgeoning twin will be reduced.
  • Stretch more - the back and elbow will go back to normal
  • Tell Fitness World to go to hell
  • Tell Shaw Cable to go to hell
  • Welcome Telus into my home
  • Read and digest more - the data and dates will come
  • A work list is needed to organize me
  • Book my MH flights
  • Call AS to make changes if possible
  • Don't take on any more responsibilities
  • Get a new laptop or chromebook - and soon - before my lovely, trusty X201 (Lenovo) dies
  • Ash is asleep - don't wake him