Literally and metaphorically. So efficient.

I need new shoes - but not just any shoe. It has to be suitable for biking, walking around in town and up and down trails. I want it to be water resistant enough that light rain will be repelled when I'm biking (nothing worse than getting to your destination with wet socks), and also to keep my feet dry should I have to step in a puddle when meanderthals get in the way.

I also need to reboot the intellectual process and mind so that I don't sit around and think evil thoughts about the ass-hole gardener who works for the yoga studio that tosses spent soil and plants willy-nilly, makes a mess and overall is an arrogant fuckhead who should be placed into a yoga pose, tied up and left overnight to get cramps.

Oh, did I say that - well, he wasn't very nice. Asshat.


While I wait for my red bean bun to warm up...

I've pretty much been up for the last 4.5 hours and been trying to get things put away, lists put down and also to let ideas percolate. In the mean time, the Ashmolean is out for the count, snoring away like there's no point in being awake to enjoy the day - FOMO or JOMO? He votes JOMO.

JOMO = Joy of missing out for those of you who don't know.

Anyway, one more rejection came in last week - I'm getting better at these. It only takes 24 hours for me to turn the disappointment and despair and absolute blackness and pointlessness around now.

Let's not forget the gap, whose true name is disappointment....what was that quote again? Here, let me find it for you:

"Mind the gap! Mind the gap! You hear on the London tube as you alight. What is this "gap", foreigners think, looking around for a furry rodent scurrying around the platform. They of course refer to the gap between the train and the platform – Mind the gap. The true gap, however, is the difference between what you think life should be and what life is, and its true name is disappointment."

See? So true isn't it? Fay Weldon - still alive and still lovely.

Anyway, then there was a meeting with Dr. Passive-Aggressive who can't make up his mind about anything, nor make a decision, nor play the political game, nor see that without playing politics, you are dooming us to nothingness.

It's so time to get a MEC job or reasonable facimile thereof.

I think my 5 year plan will start off as: Use the next two years and take a sabbatical then exit - but just have to work the details out. But mustn't be hasty about this for now. Impending changes - so stressful. But life continues and there's not much one can do about it.

Must. Remember. Overall, I will land on my own two feet. There may be some changes that I have to get used to, but land I will, and options I have.

Okay now that little bit of meaningless reassurance is over and done with, let's get on with the list.

Today I would like to:

  • draw some semi-circles for a circle
  • do some homework from years ago (2009)
  • clear my brain of toxic buildups
  • set myself up for more rejection
  • check Ashmolean outputs (and inputs)
  • Ignore Dr. P-A (cause I'm pissed with him)
  • Stop at that place where the cash registers never stop ringing
  • Figure out how to stick it to the money-grubbing companies that rape us daily

Not too bad a list today actually. Quite doable - and even if I don't complete it, it's at least a start.
Start - think about it - there's one thing that worries me - it's the whole, The Gods punish us by granting our wishes thing.

Must go practice letting go (aka Frozen).