The wisdom of Ross

The telly series Fraiser was profound in its own inimitable way.

Take the story of Lupe Velez by Ross - a quick run down - although mind you this was probably given some dramatic license to the actual facts, which themselves remain controversial. The essence of Ross' story is that Lupe Velez wanted to go out in a blaze of glory, and so made arrangements for a death that would take place amidst flowers (much like thingy (I forget which drama diva it was) who tried to die by asphyxiation through an excess of lilies of the valley - she filled an entire room with lilies of the valley and spent the night there hoping to be suffocated by their sweet scent; instead she woke up with a headache (and probably heart ache at not having achieved her gaol). Anyway, after taking 580 seconal, drinking and eating, she went to bed to die, but somewhere along the line, according to Ross, stumbled to pay homage to the porcelain god, tripped, threw up and ended up dying head first in the maws of the porcelain god.

The point of Ross' story? You will often get where you want to go, but the way there may not be quite what you wanted or expected. 

Take for example - McGill - where I wanted to do graduate studies - but one of my referees failed to write a letter and so I ended up in UBC. Still, I eventually ended up going there for a post-doc instead. I also wanted to work in London, and sure enough I did eventually 

The other thing that Fraiser talked about was that sometimes you don't say goodbye to an object in particular - that's not the point of the regrets, dashed illusions, disappointments of the goodbye - but in effect, you're saying goodbye to what you thought you had, or wanted, or expected.. 

So that's another lesson to be learnt: Know what you are saying goodbye too, and don't throw out the baby with the bathwater.

Another thing said, by the wise of women of the West: Remind yourself that he/she cares very much for you indeed. This would fall into the category of Agreement #3 which is that you don't assume, but instead look at the facts.

Yah. maybe delusional but what the hell. Sometimes reality can be difficult to swallow without a bit of sugar. 

Talk about abstract - but hey, I have to obfuscate for vurry, vurry, good reasons...as James Corden said, "I must be verrry, verrrryyyy careful....".

LOL can also mean many things other than laughing.