Process

Naive spelt backwards
"...and so in my naive way, I'm going to say we should continue trusting in the process..."

Words to strike fear in one's heart - Naive Trust in the Process, which certainly isn't naive but leans heavily on the side of malevolence.

And that brings me to

SRT1: Sociopaths are the human equivalent of teflon, although it may be quite unfair at this stage to judge and condemn so early on, but I do have to protect the terrified little organ beating away in the region below the chest - not the heart, but the liver from where all feelings of dread and fear stem because of the hormones it produces. Beat. Beat. Beat. There. There. There. I'll protect you to the best of my ability. That or have a Guinness.





Gaze well upon me and judge not harshly
SRT2: Judging - I realised in a moment of blinding clarity and dismay that I have been judged all my life. From the moment I was born to an Asian family, I was expected to live up to a certain standard - some of which I failed miserably. Two glaring examples - buying a car with only two doors ("How are [those pronouncing the judgements] supposed to get in an out easily?"); and ("Ohhhhh (in a falling tone), you're not coming home till when?"). Then doing the job I do, I'm judged on everyday; it seems like everything we do now is to subject to some kind of review or oversight - not to help us improve mind you, but so that paper files can be generated and people kept employed - never, after all these years of collecting data have I seen a metrics report from these collectors - why, it seems these days that every time we do something, we have to update our CV. Why not just issue us buh-loodly Google Glasses so we can record every minute of our lives, upload it to the cloud and grant access to the buh-loody judges. This would spare us having to update 4 or 5 CV formats. And then when I die, I'm pretty certain - doesn't matter whether I believe or not, have faith or not, am actively atheist or not for if there's a Deity judging, he or she is not going to care whether you believe or not - plus they may have specialist knowledge to their own existence - I'll be judged to and banish to certain levels of hell or otherwise. Judge me not till you know me. Bah.

It's not washing its hands, but rubbing them with glee
SRT3: It's a sign that I'm getting more sleep - I've started dreaming again. Not mind you dreams of Beatrix Potter hedgehogs on tree stumps whispering about the gifts they're going to buy their father for Father's day, but close. Instead I dreamt that Dr. Gazelle ushered me out of the corridors of an institution where clouds of flies were buzzing around our heads into a muddy field where the wind blew away the flies, then the gazelle got onto a bike and rode around the field - Unfortunately I couldn't tell whether he was wearing a Vulpine rain jacket or not. I rather guess not actually, but be that as it may. In other parts of the dream, I was once again eyed with askance by a pair of bright eyes that seemed to ask questions of me that I wasn't prepared to answer so there we were - the interrogator and the interrogated - at an impasse which was silent and growing quickly into a canyon between us. At least with the distance, I shan't be able to see the eyes and can pretend they don't exist.

Nano Ninja Androids will keep my dreams safe
But enough of seemingly random thoughts. I shall have to focus my thoughts and get on with the next application that looms. Whoo-hoo. The challenge this time is to work the phrase nano-ninjas into the application; after all I managed to get "steric anxiety" into my thesis, as in "The ligand in question is likely unable to approach the Ru(II) centre due to steric anxiety"  - my proudest moment in my published career to date. Sad isn't it?

That's it then. To continue like nothing (well, it's true I suppose - nothing is happening) is happening, and to trust in the process. Let's just hope we're not swept away in a wave of destruction.

Image of Teenage Android Ninja Turtles by +Sho Baba