I lied

Salman, not Salmon..but much less evil
I lied. I've listened to the wisdom from the Wise Woman of the West. Again.

Alan said, "She is an evil, vicious woman, Not good at all".

A very clever sentence because ending the contrast between the start and end shows you that Alan isn't a bad person at all. It gives you the impression that he's a normal, nice, regular sort of man who has been driven to distraction.

Then if I launch myself into a flight of fancy, it is also another clever way of showing me the narrative and drama. In the first place, "She is an evil, vicious woman..." - It's not very nice nor fair to Salman Rushdie but then again fatwahs aren't very politic.

Then in the second place, Barbara spoke to Aunt Dorothy who was in high dudgeon because her closest friends had forgotten her birthday, even though Aunt D never forgot theirs, and Barbara said, "Why not return evil with good and invite them to lunch". Aunt D thought about it and decided it was a good idea because it meant that she could make her friends feel guilty while putting herself in the right.

Makes you wonder about the nature of good and evil doesn't it?


Decision making at its best
It's time I made some decisions because I can't sit around thinking about the nature of good and evil
  1. Decision: We will label the damn things with radioactivity - long-lived at that. This will make my life easier.
  2. Decision: I will not plan or manipulate matters because it only falsifies everything and makes me like Aunt D, or Alan's ex-wife.
  3. Decision: I will be make every effort to go to the gee-gees on Saturday because that's what counts - something else that Neddy and Claire with the gold stars said.
  4. Decision: The lupins will flower if it kills me.

Today I feel a little bit overwhelmed by the things to be done, the demands that are placed on me, the expectations I set up for myself, and worst of all, the ambiguity and uncertainty that surrounds me like some miasma of dread (that's the drama sneaking in).

Drama and narrative incorporated.
Drama: Angst, anger, irritation, over-reacting, stubborn refusal to face facts or meet hobgoblin deadlines issued by small-minded, tawdry, big-fat-ass purveyors of red-tape. Ditto with innocent bystanders who are minding their own business. Ditto with the people who are missing context and delaying the mail. 

Narrative: The hobgoblins are only doing their job, but they still have big fat asses. They lead such tiny little lives that I can surely be generous enough to throw them a sop or two. The innocent are innocent and so I shouldn't include them in my drama (not that they are aware of it anyway) and drag them down into a cesspit of  unresolved and inchoate feelings masquerading as rationale: "I thought...", "I can't read minds...", "Unstable isn't the word...", "Freak..." As for missing context - I know it will arrive and I will incorporate it as needed. It's not that the document won't get done, it's how much steeping can take place before Monday. That's okay. Connections are made regardless.


And so it goes. Reality is what you make of it. Dramatize and die gnashing your teeth, or recognize the narrative and treat yourself by buying LED bulbs so that the daily blue bars from BC Hydro's smart meters drop, and you save money so you can go to Tuscany and buy fresh olive oil by the demijohn. Just call me Alan. See Dr. J, I can post without talking about the orb.

Opening a window into this week's reality